FoodLady Chronicles – it’s 1am, do you know why StolenDog is barking edition:
Dear Ms. Scrawnypants StolenDog, you’re killing me. First, the good news – you’re looking
great better! Your fur is shiny and you have gained some weight. In fact, your progress in just one week has been impressive. We segregated you with access to outside to limit the amount of mopping and sanitizing I have to do and while I’m sure that you think you feel great and strong and that you must stand in the front yard happily barking and howlingly whooping it up along with the other neighborhood doggies, here’s what happens in the bedroom; you wake up the idiot pain in the ass noisy son of a female dog special dog (Sam) who has never had a single day of discomfort in his entire life and quite literally kept the entire house awake last week singing the song of his abuse (high pitched keening) because, GASP!, someone put a laundry basket in front of his food bowl and he no longer had access to his kibble for two HOURS! I know, the horror, right? Anywhoodle, when you go all barky-bark-bark, Sam snorts himself awake from his upside-down-neck-breaking-looking position and starts “helping”. Loudly. So
pretty-pretty-girl, pretty please shaddup? Kthanksluvyoushutup! Love, FoodLady.
So now that the FoodLady world has been rearranged and Ms. StolenDog is closed in the house and the brindles (Herbert & Sam) are again asleep, I’m going to try this sleeping thing again myself–I hear it’s keen. -smooches!