Random Dog Training Class

​So last night my friend enrolled in a dog training class told me I should bring the Dobster to training class so we could see each other (being an adult and trying to have friends is hard). So I did. Other than randomly “woo-wooing!” inappropriately when other dogs were taking their turn he did really well. I could wax poetic about the Rock Dobster and how much I love the little dork, but there was another dog in class that was so cute she physically hurt me. Her name is Gerta (squeee!) and we should all give thanks that I am not her person because y’all, I would ruin that dog. Whatever she would want would be hers for as long as she wanted it. She snortles. She is happiness incarnate. She is Gerta and she is loved by many!

Not a great picture…but gives you a good idea of her size.
Again, not a great photo but Dobby loves her too!
But lookit! Lookit da snortly Gerta! Love her!

​FoodLady Chronicles – Home Alone Edition:

Dear dogs, I know. I know we’ve been in and out of the house too many times and out for far too long the past few days and I’m really sorry. Still, I’m a little concerned/confused at your new latched door-opening skillset and am mildly concerned you may have found and eaten a person with questionable taste in footwear.

Allow me to explain. 

We arrived home from today’s family/friends shenaniganry to find all the dogs joyfully romping in the yard. Uh….okay? When we left them they were all safely locked in the house. The main gate was (thankfully) still latched and everyone was safe and present. It appears that they used Humphrey to open the screen door (he stands up on his hind legs and opens the screen door by walking awkwardly backwards (it’s freakin’ hilarious to watch)) and then maybe they worked in tandem to throw Dobby at the closed door secured from the outside with a hook & eye latch until it opened? Not really sure, just know they were pleased in a “look what we can do!” way.  

All of that was at least explainable…where it got a bit weirder was the discovery of a chewed up and destroyed sequined high-heeled flip flop in the living room (wtf?!). Some of y’all may not know me very well but rest assured knowing I do not own anything sequined nor would I ever survive walking in a high-heeled flip flop. 

That’s all that was found. It just makes me wish I had them on a surveillance camera(s) to see what the hell they were up to while we were out because it seems like they were really busy. 

Love,
FoodLady 

​FoodLady Chronicles – Dobby Update (day 36) 

Little bastard made me have emotions last night.
So, in an attempt to make Dobby the best and most well-rounded dog he can be, I’ve been dragging him places; this helps to increase his confidence (the more he is exposed to, the better). Last night he got to meet two new friendly dogs and sniff a whole new yard – much fun was had by all. He has now been tested near cats in 3 separate environments and I believe he can safely be called cat-friendly. He is very well behaved in the car and has no trouble exiting the car on command, but getting into the car is still super scary; it’s a work in progress. 

Last night on the way home I was thinking about Herbert and how much fun he would have been to have in the wedding and how much he would have loved the new (to me) Jeep. As I was thinking these things my hand was on the edge of the passenger seat and that’s when Dobby lay his head on top of my hand, exactly the way Herbert used to.

Yeah, I know, it punched me right in my feels too. *sniffle*

This doesn’t mean anything, I’m pretty sure I just have a comfy hand. It just felt meaningful at the time and made me get all teary-eyed. 

As per normal, the one-dog-only-on-the-bed rule has been exceeded and Ziesa is snoring prettily next to me while Piper has wound herself around my legs like a cat at the top of a staircase. Humphrey is asleep in the dog bed in my closet, SamSam is asleep in the dog bed in Darrin’s closet, the Dobinator is currently sleeping peacefully (upside-down) in the other dog bed and looking as dorkily Dobby as it is possible to look and I’m going to get a couple more hours of sleep before getting up (again). 

Night all,

FoodLady

Tussling Took a Turn

Somedays this house is clean, calm, and happy; but to be perfectly honest lately with five (*blinks* when the hell did I end up with five again?!) freaking dogs we are doing well if everyone is happy. 

Yesterday everyone wasn’t happy. To the best of my understanding , either Sam-Sam the (asshole) model decided that Humphrey aka Big Stinky (asshole) was looking at him funny or vice versa, but the happy tussle time took a turn. Which led to a *very* displeased FoodLady wielding a chair. Turns out holding a lawn chair over your head scares the bejeesus out of any non-invested dog and gets them out of way. Then by simply placing the chair over the SamSam I separated the two assholes nicely. 

Safety Note: I was okay separating them because they weren’t actively trying to kill each other, just some pack stupidity. Sort of the difference between high school kids fighting in the hall vs someone fighting for their life.

Of course there were some scrapes, but this morning I noticed poor Humphrey had a puncture; cleaned it and found a second one. That’s when I knew that I had to take him to the vet. dammit. Antibiotics and then back home. 

The house didn’t get any cleaner or calmer while I was out. 

*sigh*

​FoodLady Chronicles – Kinda Proud But Really More Annoyed Edition:

Okay, I like to think I’m a super-amazingly-good-at-dogs kinda person. But really? I’m just better than some and worse than others; just like everyone else. 

So when I say, “look at Dobby!” Just 11 days in and infection gone, growing hair, playing fetch, chewing on antlers and nylabones, and just relaxing and getting healthy I feel a little proud. But really it just makes me more irritated at his previous human because of how little it actually took to get him healthy (healthier, anyway). Food, one bravecto, one course of antibiotics, probiotics, baths, and some coconut oil massages and poof! a whole different dog. 

Anywhoodle, he is getting pretty comfy! 

❤❤❤

​FoodLady Chronicles – The Dobinator, Day 5:

 This dog is killing me with all the hopeful happiness and the cute. His joy in the world around him is downright infectious. Chicken?! YAY! Kibble?! YAY! Tennis ball?! YAY! 

Yes, the Dobby-dob-dob has officially been introduced to toys and although it has only happened one time so far, he picked up one ripped up tennis ball and shook the life out of it before bounding away looking *very* proud of himself. 

He is about 99% scab free and his skin is looking wonderful. He has already started to grow in some fuzz. No lie, he still looks like an elderly scrotum; but by golly, at least he now looks like a HEALTHY elderly scrotum. 

Okay, so here’s a little extra knowledge I just learned and am passing on for you other dog rescue folks out there because for me, this was some life-altering information: Bravecto works for demodectic mange. 

I know! This is a BIG deal. 

Okay, for non-doggie people who have read this far, dog mange comes in two forms: Sarcopic & Demodectic. Sarcopic is nasty and infectious, yet is fairly easily destroyed. Demodectic is usually considered not contagious but is often considered an autoimmune reaction and when puppies under a year have a small amount of hair loss it is usually best to leave it alone and it will go away. Unfortunately some dogs get it and just can’t stop reacting to the mites that are naturally present on most dogs and they end up looking like Dobby and up until now there has been no easy way to treat it. The shelter recommended Dobby get a Bravecto to see if it worked before going for the old standard of care which is ivermectin daily because they tried it on another dog with mange and it worked. Being a skeptical (correlation ≠ causation) person I agreed to give it a whirl and then immediately went looking for the research, and holy crap! Extremely positive results somewhere around 94% hair regrowth within the 90 day treatment coverage (1 bravecto covers 90 days of flea & tick prevention). 

And Dobby, who appears to have white and gray hairs sprouting all over, agrees that it seems to be working. 

​FoodLady Chronicles – Dobby Day 3: 

It was a SUPER big day for the Rock Dobster, but we will start with what y’all missed on Day 2. As of yesterday the Dobinator had successfully met SamSam and Ziesa with no issues, so later in the evening I introduced him to Ms. Piper one on one. He was his normal wiggly waggly stinky nekkid mole rat self, however I think Ms. Piper *may* be more of a sight-hound than I thought because unlike the other dogs who were all, “‘sup? shall we butt sniff fellow canid?” she had a very clear, “Holy Crap what IS it? Aaaaaaaahhhh! KILL IT WITH FIRE!!! Stop Laughing Lady! RUN!” response to the poor wee Dobby. Don’t worry, he was still a happy little soul and went to his clean bed joyfully wagging.

So this morning (Day 3) he got his 2nd warm bath and he was a fan. Got him all cleaned up, medicated and fed and then I was off to work. 

Then tonight, oooh! it was the best night of his life! (although the bar has, thus far, been pretty low)

Guess who got to meet the whole pack? The Dobster, that’s who! His level of wiggle and tail waggle cannot be overstated! Humphrey (the largest and least well-behaved of our idiots) was very very very good. Everyone (even Piper, although she waited til the others did it first) sniffed and play-bowed and was everything that a well-adjusted group of dogs SHOULD be when meeting a newcomer. It. Was. Wonderful.  

I let everyone sniff, bow, pee and dance for about 10 minutes and then it was time to let the Dobby rest and eat more dinner. I have never in my life seen a dog as truly joyful as Dobby was being accepted by the pack, it was as if everything was right and good. 

We left our dogs out to finish the evening’s tussle and play and brought Dobby in. He is starting to explore and I am encouraging that, but when it was time to bring the dogs in it was time for Dobby to be secured in the office.  I looked in the office and Darrin went into the small enclosed yard, no Dobby? Then, I saw him and where he was hurt me right in my feels. He was all curled up in our bedroom in one of the dog beds on the floor, you know, where the pack sleeps. 

Dobby had a good day. ❤

The Adventures of Dobby – Day 1 & 2

Well, the furless (nekkid) dog previously known as Mr. Stinky was renamed Dobby last night due to his disturbing resemblance to Dobby the house-elf from Harry Potter; but no need to worry – his impressive wiffyness remains intact. 
For folks with a soul, prepare yourself, this tidbit is going to punch you in the gut a little; ready? okay, last night during his nice warm bath when I was gently cleaning his skin, he made this soft groaning sound and leaned into my hand. That’s when I realized this poor little bugger hasn’t been touched much during his first year of life and it felt good. Yep, that’s a heartbreaker right there, isn’t it? Hit me square in my feels. I told him not to worry, he would be very sick of me fussing over him very soon. 

So, for folks not familiar with the joys of dog rescue you may be unaware that introducing a new dog, especially a sick dog, to an established pack of dogs is not as easy as letting them all sniff each other and then they take off playing. Nope. That’s a bad idea; please don’t do that. It’s more like you become the ringleader of distraction circus. “Let’s go in this room pack of dogs!! Look, there’s toys and treats for you!” or “Let’s go outside pack of dogs!! There are toys and things to bark at!!” Then go to the Dobster’s room and try to get him to come out to the (separated) outside to use the restroom while you get him clean, medicated, fed, watered and settled. Then release the pack who immediately sniffs everywhere the Dobinator stepped all looking at eachother like, “dude….there’s totes another dog here. I think he stepped here. and here. and holy crap, here too!!” You keep this shell game up for as the sick dog gets healthier, eventually allowing him to meet a couple of members of the pack one on one. Slowly, over the course of a month or so, you get the pack to forget that the other dog hasn’t always been there. It’s a different process for every dog. 
But the SamSam dog? He disagrees with the process and as the only dog in this circus with experience in acrobatics this butthead decided that there was a butt to sniff and nothing would keep him from sniffing it. This was of concern because Mr. SamSam, well he loves puppies and kittens and cats and probably would be great with bunny rabbits, ducks, and all the other cute things you sometimes see dogs pictured with, but grown-up other dogs usually cause him to get fiesty. So, when SamSam managed a matrix-like leap to jump INTO the segregated area of yard (this was a new thing) to meet Dobby I was very watchful of his body languange. Thankfully, it appears that according to SamSam, that Dobby is “the wounded baby nekkid mole rat who needs love and cleaning and more cleaning” rather than adult intact male dog invading his territory.  The Dobinator was also excited to be sniffed and fussed over. I still separated them as soon as the opportunity presented itself, always best to leave it on a good note. 

Dobby has made a couple of impressively-sized examples of his digestive system working well, and he is eating and drinking consistently. He is still (obviously) exhausted and is starting his second day of antibiotics (cephlaxin). He looks rough, but impressively improved for less than 24 hours since pickup. 

*insert expletive of your choice here*

As a person who loves dogs, there are some days when the disgusting actions of unknown humans really bruise my soul; today was one of those days.

While driving to do a speech for work I saw a brief glimpse of mange-riddled naked skin and said to my co-worker (V; who was also going to be speaking), “shit, there’s a dog  over there who needs help.” She didn’t see it but agreed we would stop after our presentation on the way back and see if it was still there, if so we would stop and take it to the animal welfare center. After the presentations, V helped me find the right place along the road back and I couldn’t see a dog; V spotted it and gave me a chunk of sandwich for him and off I went. People, the dog was a mess. Hell, calling him a dog is kind of a stretch; calling him a crusty mange-riddled naked-mole-rat with a pigpen-like cloud of stench almost visibly wafting around him would have probably been more appropriate.

“Well, hello there Mr. Stinky.”

He was curled up in the bottom section of a rotting drivers seat, he gratefully and delicately took the sandwich and and got up to follow me. His feet looked extremely inflamed and his toenails painfully overgrown, his poor face was a scabby-riddled mess and he had a flea infection from hell. He appeared to have about one square inch of hair. I attached a leash to him which (obviously) freaked him out and he tried to pull back to his “cushion;” I grabbed one of the extra blankets from the car (I had already prepped the back of the vehicle with towels and blankets so any infection/pests/smell could be contained) and picked him up and placed him inside the car and covered all but his head with a blanket (more for the smell containment than anything else, but I think he felt safer.) I didn’t tell my coworker this, but I knew we were taking him to his death. Not because she would disagree, but because I didn’t want her to be sad. To me, a clean quick death after a good meal while someone who cared told him that he was a good and wonderful dog who deserved better than he received and that he would be remembered was a hell of a lot better than being left to die slowly and painfully from secondary infections by some asshole who did wrong by this dog.

As suspected, the animal welfare center is already over-filled with wonderfully healthy dogs & puppies dropped off by other irresponsible dog owners and the chances of this rather gross dog made mostly of scabs, infections, and smell finding an adoptive home is less than likely. It is simply a matter of managing what few resources the shelter has to do the most good. He watched everyone doing everything, obviously nervous but not reactive, stoically accepting having his skin scraped and blood drawn. I stood there uselessly, using my hip to keep the table from wobbling and providing what comfort I could while they confirmed he was an approximately 1 year old intact male, 20lbs, complete with fleas, demodectic mange, swollen feet with overgrown nails and a few nasty secondary skin infections. He watched everyone with calm accepting eyes, obviously nervous but not reactive. He tolerated his skin being scraped and blood being drawn with no reaction. Surprisingly, he turned out to be heartworm negative. His eyes lit up when he was offered a packet of cat food which he rather delicately ate and he lapped some of the offered water, although he seemed to do that to be polite, not because he wanted it. He kept looking at the box the cat food came from, seeming to hope more would appear.

Decision time: I brought him in, I have to make the decision; do I take responsibility to foster this dog until healthy and find it a home or do I have him put down.

I can exhaustively list the many reasons why I can’t bring an additional dog into my home, but every single one of them can be boiled down to money and time. Do I have the funds available to feed and medically treat this dog until he is healthy and do I have any extra time to spend with him to slowly (painfully slowly) integrate him into the pack and train him to be a well behaved indoor dog before finding him the perfect home?

Not only no, but Hell No. Nope. Not even a little bit. I have nothing left to give.

This dog would add more stress, more stink, more pain in the butt medication schedules, more baths, more cleaning, more exhaustion, and not to mention less money and less time with the other dogs who do not get enough as it is. The logical and intelligent course of action would be to put him down and go on with my life, accepting that his miserable existence was not my fault and that he is not my responsibility and I did everything I could for him and ended his suffering.
That stinky little guy just stood there on that wobbly table watching everyone work around him, accepting everything happening to him as his lot in life and was still able to find joy in a pieces of a cheese sandwich, a packet of cat food and a kind hand. He has to be in more discomfort than can be described in words, but he didn’t lash out or become catatonic. He is strong and sweet and he deserves a hell of a lot better than what humans have allowed his life to become; but so many animals do.

I can’t save them all, but I saved his stinky butt.

I just couldn’t face putting him down when everything he has is treatable and he could live a good and happy life for the cost of some money (which I never have) and time (which I also never have). This was not a good decision for me, but it was a good decision.

Ziesa the Disturbing…

​Dear Ziesa, we already have a dog dedicated to making things weird (Piper), please stop your attempts to make things weirder.

Love, 

FoodLady.

So, the other morning I wake up like most days with approximately 300lbs of Ziesa-head resting on my leg. This pretty little princess has little to no work ethic, has embraced the persona and demeanor of an 85 year old grumpy woman, and currently rules this house with an iron paw; but she is an AMAZING snuggler. Her super power is snuggling up tight against you and deep breathing until everyone is just as sleepy as her, it’s her gift. Anywhoodle, I wake up, stretch, and notice she had eaten a large section of the left leg of my shorts. The shorts I. was. wearing. 

While I slept, Ziesa put her head on my leg and I can only assume she became a bit bored (peckish?) and looked around thinking, “toy?” nah, too far away; “sheet?” nah; “pillow?” boring; “hey, I wonder if I can eat the clothes off FoodLady without waking her up!?” Now there’s a challenge!! This is what we’ve been training for; let the nibbling begin!!!

Thankfully, her natural exhaustion kicked in before she stripped me completely shorts-less; but I slept through it completely. Fingers crossed I don’t start waking up in a shredded pile of former pajamas on a regular basis. It’s weird enough around here without her help. 

Love to y’all,

FoodLady